Sex Trafficking vs Prostitution

Description

1. Paraphrase info must also have an in-text citation at the end of it like so (Daniels, 6) -you have a number of paragraphs with source info that does not have paraphrase citation. -use a variety of sources, more than just websites -do not use answers.com, for example, imagine if I told you I was going to look up how to give you grades on answers.com – you would be worried. Or if we were defusing a bomb and I said to you, check answers.com -do not use answers.com or wikipedia, for example, imagine if I told you I was going to look up how to give you grades on answers.com – you would be worried. Or if we were defusing a bomb and I said to you, check answers.com *now imagine if I went to my book shelf and said, “I have just the right book for this!” 2. Once you fix these, you will then have to fix the balance between outside and inside info. -you want to make sure have sources paragraphs (with citation) balanced with comment paragraphs – your opinion and synthesis of arguments (with no cite – b/c it is you.) 3. Must work on your transitions, when you go from one topic to another you must mix in transitions -these can be at begin. of para, at end of para, and even as a one sentence in between paragraphs 4. You have a number of formatting issues – MUST FIX WORKS CITED 5. Overall, you paper has lots of details. You have made a good start but I want you to work on improving the balance between your comments and outside info. 6. many of your paragraphs need to be developed – part of this will be the transitions, the key is balance must balance quotes vs. paraphrased outside vs. your info long paragraphs vs some shorter, etc. 7. try to use a graphic or chart that adds info 8. See sample essay 9. Must follow MLA see link below: Website: http://owl.english.purdue.edu/owl/resource/747/01/

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